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In a move that’s sureto make Mike Bianchi happy, Sports Illustrated is trying to do what the NCAA wouldn’t and what the SEC couldn’t do: Stop Cam Newton.
Newton gracestheir latest cover, and it’s pretty clear, at least to me, SI is doing it because they have money on Oregon winning and putting Newton on the cover is the only way they can conceive of stopping him. I mean, you can almost see Phil Knight’s fingerprints all over this, and I’m sure the discussion went something like:
“Hey, you guys want some free Air Jordans? PutCammy-Camon the cover. I warn you, however: if my Ducks don’t win, I’m buying the company.”
In honor of tonight’s revenge game for New England Patriots running backDanny Woodhead, arguably one of the best feel-good stories of this year’s NFL season, I present to you the 5 Greatest Woodies of All Time. SorryRon Jeremy, you or your pals aren’t eligible for this award.
5. Kerry Wood, pitcher
Wood burst on the scene for the Chicago Cubs in 1998. It took him no time at all to start his domination, throwing a20-strikeout 1-hitterin just his 5th major league start. He went on to have 200+ strikeouts in 4 of his first 5 seasons. Wood might be a little higher on this list, butarm troubleshave derailed his career, at least as a starter. Hecontinues to draw interestthough having reinvented himself as an effective, yet injury-prone reliever.
4. Clu Heywood, first baseman
Played by 1982 Cy Young winner Pete Vuckovich in the moveMajor League, Heywood was a big time Indians killer until Ricky Vaughn manned up and blew three straight fast balls by him and the Indians won the pennant. One of my favorite movies of all time (and another post entirely).
3. Charles Woodson, defensive back
In 1997 Woodson became the first defensive Heisman Trophy winner, though he did make some appearances at wide receiver as well. He led Michigan to the national championship which led to me declaringMichigan’s fight songas the greatest ever.
2. Lynette Woodard, basketball star
Woodard became the first ever female Harlem Globetrotter. She was also a Kansas Jayhawk making her my second favorite Jayhawk female athlete. My favorite? Former setterMolly LaMere.
1. David Wooderson, stoner
“That’s what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.”
What agreat movie. Does it get any better than that?
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What good does it do if a crowd is amped to a frothy frenzy and the team their supporting plays softer than tissue in what was their biggest game of the year? Not a damn bit of good, which is also an accurate way to describe the play from the Cleveland Cavaliers, who watched helplessly as LeBron James proceeded their destroy the hearts, minds and will with a devastating performance, especially in the third quarter. And no,the witty signsdidn’t help one damn bit.
The Miami Herald referred to the moment as“Homecoming King,” but the way LeBron first toyed his former teammates, and then destroyed them on the court with a cold-as-ice, methodical performance, including a third quarter that broke a number of Miami Heat and Cavaliers single-game records,“The Assassination Agenda” is more appropriate.
But what was even more surprising— I figured Wade would carry LeBron, but no, it was James who destroyed them, making it all-the-more painful for Cavaliers fans— was just how soft the Cavaliers played (and acted) in response to LeBron’s destruction.
All the halftime brush offs in the world don’t amount to a hill of beans if you aren’t willing to back that up on the court, Mo.
Joking around with him while he’s killing you is just weak and soft.
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I’m not sure what the intended message is here— maybe the University of Florida is a safe haven forGlee-types— but man, it’s got a whole lot of pizazz going for it. I mean, is there anything else to do after watching this video besides“The Chomp?” If there is, I’m not aware of it.
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To quote one of Jim Rome’s soundbites, the Oregon fan with the finger extended undoubtedly thinks the call on the floor was a“Bad call, bad call. We don’t like that call. Not a very good call.” I doubt losing by three after Oregonfell just shortin their comeback attempt didn’t make him feel much better. In fact, I bet he had a double finger for that particular result.
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There’s a basketball game of some note tonight, in case you didn’t know, and it features a player you may or may not have heard about making his to the city he loves so much. That’s right, LeBron’s appearingin Akrontonight. Bad jokes aside, it’s pretty safe to say there hasn’t been a regular season NBA game to get this much hype since, well, maybe ever. While it’s true other franchises have played meaningful regular season games before— like the Celtics versus Lakers in the days of Magic Johnson and Larry Bird— I don’t remember they hype level being quite this high.
Of course, there wasn’t any nifty Internet technologies like Twitter, YouTube or Facebook around back then, and these entities directly fuel immediate reaction fire, making the hype meter rise to“off the charts” like levels.
With that in mind, I’ve spent a little bit of time checking out YouTube, looking for videos that help propel the first Miami Heat/Cleveland Cavaliers game since“The Decision” into something much bigger than it probably should be; and buddy, I was not disappointed:
Starting us off is this gem from YouTube userblndsundoll4mja Cavaliers fan who like to express herself using the color pink, along with the gift of song:
Did I see Duckie and Andie running around in the background?
Next up is this gemfeatured at Dime Magazinefittingly titled“Return of the King,” and it offers a nice synopsis of what’s happened thus far:
Are you looking for something to sing to LeBron when the game tips off? Try this little ditty, done the tune of The Grinch Song:
Sample lyric:“You’re a monster, Mr James. Your heart’s an empty slot. Your brain is full of Nikes, you’ve got garlic up your snot…” Yeah, Season’s Greetings, indeed.
Next is a WWE/rasslin’ mash-up and the results are phenomenal:
Let’s just say I wouldn’t walk around Cleveland tonight after the game’s over if my name was LeBron James. There’s a chance he wouldn’t make it back to Miami in one piece. And with that, I hope your ready for the Miami/Cleveland throwdown.
I, for one, sincerely hope LeBron doesn’t do the talcum powder toss to the Cavaliers crowd tonight. Things could get ugly really, really quickly.
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One guy thinks tomorrow night’s Miami Heat/Cleveland Cavaliers/The-Night-He-Came-Home game is only“one game,” while his former teammate thinks the most NBA’s most anticipated contest of its early season will be“more than a game.” So who’s right? Considering the absolute orgy of“LeBron goes back to Cleveland” hubbub littering the sports world today— the game’s not until Thursday night, giving us 48 hours of hype— the second player, Mo Williams, clearly has a more accurate pulse reading than LeBron and his desire to downplay his return to the city he so famously spurned on that fateful July evening.
Granted, I’m not expecting to see a repeat of the Malice in the Palace debacle— although, if LeBron does indeed do that silly talcum powder thing for the Cleveland crowd, we just might— but to act like the first Miami/Cleveland game of the season is just another in the long line of 82 is a mistake. That being said, it’s easy to understand James’ desire to downplay the situation, but it seems like he’s just making it worse.
I could be wrong, however. LeBron’stoo-little-too-late apologymay not ring hollow in the ears of Cavaliers fans and they might just decide to forgive and forget. Then again, I might be the overall number one pick in next summer’s NBA draft, too.
“It’s definitely more than a game, I can tell you that,” Williams said following practice Wednesday.“This game has been circled. There’s a lot of playoff feeling going on.”
Of course, with the Cavaliers putting that much pressure on themselves, I’m full expecting the Heat to make things worse and actually win the game. Needless to say, the game-winning play will probably be made by LeBron, naturally, which will then lead to an avalanche of half-full cups raining down on the Heat players as they try to get off the Quicken Loans Arena floor.
4. Clu Heywood, first baseman
1. David Wooderson, stoner
